animals that are poisonous but not venomous are so funny they’re like “you can eat me and I can’t stop you. just know we’re both going to die”
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Man would it be fucking hilarious if goblins reproduced like Shriekers from Tremors or fucking what
Eat a bunch, makes some weird noises, and barf up a baby
Love the fact that you have no comment on "barf up a baby" but yes I can definitely expand on that gimme a sec
So to go back to how goblins reproduce I'm gonna hc that those gross sacks of goo are how! They eat stuff, vomit up goo, and curl up inside for a nap. Depending on the types and number of goblins in the goo the baby goblins form in the goo like weird creepy science experiments. They pop out a very short time later full grown and ready to eat. Nom nom motherfucker.
But like, it only takes a few days for baby goblins to grow up, and goblins are. INTENSELY protective of the babies floating around in the goo until they pop out. Like insanely. Wanna piss off goblins? Kill one of them or kill their babies. U dead. Baby gobs are super vulnerable. Goblins are terrifyingly protective of them while they're there. It extends to adulthood, goblins are stupid protective of each other! Just because they're made in that sort of mindset
SOMEHOW, by some horribly ironic mistake of magic, goblins see ALL babies as goblin babies. Like they just flat out think human babies are weird shaped goblin babies who aren't floating in the safety of their nutritious goo!!!!!! Oh no!!!!! Nursery goblins in the Darklands were taught Not to goo-ify human babies but to instead put them in the special cradles. It's why they're usually blood goblins, bcz blood goblins are smart enough to take care of babies how they Need to be
Even goblins smart enough to know "this is not a GOBLIN baby" are still "but it's BABY!!!!"
Funny thing is if a goblin by some fucking bizarre circumstances manages to RAISE a baby of another species, that creature is now a Goblin. Doesn't matter if it's obviously not a physical goblin! A goblin raised it! IT'S A GOBLIN NOW
God I have ideas for another OC and OC town and I'm about to SCREAM
Mcfuckin- four stone pickaxes and thirty diamonds in minecraft later I'm still thinking on this. Mining is great thinking time.
Adopted goblins can be any species. In the normal world there's probably even fucking cats and dogs who got adopted in as babies and fit in perfectly with their adopted families. There's a surprising number of changelings who got accidentally adopted and hid it from everyone. They're not even like, called anything else, they just call themselves goblins if they have the chance.
Like, if a changeling is a goblin kid, they just grow up in the Darklands the same as any other changeling except with a weird knowledge of goblins. They don't tell anybody. They're part of the goblin pack though and goblins think of goblins first. There's a LOT of changelings who just flat out DITCHED when Gunmar rekt the Janus Order bcz they aren't loyal to anyone but themselves - and to a goblin, yourself is all the other goblins too.
There's humans too! Not many, because humans are USUALLY careful with their babies, but there's been a few human goblin kids too. The changeling goblins help take care of them and acclimate them and explain "yeah there's all this magic bullshit going on and you're involved bcz ur a goblin now"
There's even some trolls! Haha "some" I mean a lot of Gumm-Gumms had babies and they didn't care if the goblins "got" them
The goblins are so fucking self serving though, and their kids are usually pretty much racist as shit to... everyone not a goblin. A troll can spit and call changelings Impures and then turn around and talk to their changeling sibling who's a goblin with no problem, because they're not an Impure, they're a goblin duh
This creates a lot of shenanigans between goblin kids of varying species
I'd like it to be known that it was between midnight and like, 2AM that I typed this up, in between playing minecraft, so if it's somewhat incoherent that's why
But I'm still on my bullshit fuck yeah, because the idea of goblins being fucking magic-genetically typed based on COLOR like fucking pokémon is so my shit and I'm gonna use these ideas forever and ever from now on
I have not slept and I ramble the most when I have yet to sleep today is going to be a Trip































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